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W. C. Fields Quotes
«There are only two real ways to get ahead today -- sell liquor or drink it.»
«I like children - fried.»
«I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.»
«I drink therefore I am.»
«I'm looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.)»
«No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it's only a question of degree.»
«Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people.»
«All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women.»
«Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.»
«I must have a drink of breakfast.»